You speak to me as if to a ghost 
An apparition you cannot see 
And that is somehow unworthy of you
Because of the form I have taken

You believe 
That I have ears with which to hear you 
And hands with which to serve you 
Sweet words to comfort you with
And that I never tire 

Your clipped sentences 
And nasty put downs
Coupled with tender gestures 
And bashful promises 
Give me whiplash 
I toss and turn between the dysfunction that is us

I give and you take 
You give and I take
Yet I give you loveliness
I am everything for you
Sweet and shy

You give me scoldings
Thinking you are teaching me
When really I am dozing off
Dreaming of better days 

I feel you curl around me 
I give you my warmth
I stroke your hair, your cheek
Tell you a story and send you to sleep

I see you
Lonely blue eyes

What do you long for?
In your sleep you nestle like a child, you rub your cheek against mine
Crave this love like it’s your drug –
Yes that, with your red eyes and slow tongue 
I know, baby

What do you long for?
You show me bits of you
Drawings and dreams and thoughts 
And shun me for knowing such
That you like bubble letters
And wanted to be a tattoo artist 
And think big girls are pretty 

You are beautiful
You are ravaged by bullets
A stained glass window 
Beautiful shards of luminance 
Deadly and provocative 

Ask me to hold you and I will
Ask me to love you, I do
Ask me to trust you 
But I can’t 

You don’t trust a rabid dog not to bite you 
But I will gain your trust 
And when you come to me
Teeth hidden away 
Begging for a home
I will trust you 
Trust you to love me for loving you

I will care for you
And mend you
And be what you need
And when you take what you can get 
Suck me dry
And leave
I will break 
And trust that there will be someone somewhere for me


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